On our own again :)

We had a really lovely time with the family and the boys were just delightful.  Charlie is just such a beautiful, lovely boy and Cole is funny and clever.  Fletcher?  Well hey, he's 15 now so what can you expect... he still came in and gave me a kiss at bedtime though so he's still my boy.

I got on well with my daughter and her husband and there were no issues at all.  I cooked all of Christmas lunch and let them relax.  It all turned out well and Stu's Dad also had a lovely time I think.  Yesterday the weather was great so we went to the beach (I drove, Stu was still worried about my knee going on me again).  Cole went fishing with his Dad and Fletcher and Charlie boogey boarded for ages.  When Cole found out that Charlie could now boogey board he was all fired up to show how he could do it it as well.  The funny thing is that it was the FIRST time for both of them, they'd always been too scared to do it before but once they had one ride in on a wave that was it, they were hooked.

Today Stu and I walked to the beach and I had hardly any pain so my 'good' knee is back to normal for awhile thank goodness.   

The kids all left this morning for a week's camping holiday at Taupo so after spending a few hours cleaning the house and washing all the linen etc we relaxed in the peace and quiet.  We took down the Christmas tree and any little decorations around the place as well.  All is back to normal.

Tomorrow there is an airshow in town so we will be off to that and also pop in to see Stu's father again.

That's all my news for now.  I hope you all had a lovely Christmas with loved ones.

~ Lynda

Christmas morning - lots of presents and lovely fun!

My present from Stu was a new MacBook Air M1 (latest technology... a fantastic upgrade from my old one! (not my photo, this is screen grab but it's the same colour, space grey)

The boys decorated the pavlova - a work of art!

At the beach watching the boys boogie boarding later in the day

Fletcher, Cole and Charlie

Stu helping Charlie dig a really deep hole

Me, of course, getting some sun on my legs.  It was so lovely to finally get to the beach! Horrible scar but I know it will fade in time.

My daughter with Fletcher and Charlie 

Charlie catching a wave... with a big smile on his face

Christmas Eve

The kids are all here and we've had a lovely evening.  Tomorrow is Christmas Day and the boys are all so excited.  They were worried that they wouldn't fall asleep but had no trouble by the time they went to bed.

The presents are around the tree and everything is going well.

Tomorrow Stu and I are cooking Christmas lunch (I'm not going to stress, it's just a roast... just for more people) then after that it's all summer relaxation.  I've made the desserts today and also we had birthday cake for my daughter who is 42 tomorrow.  

My knees have been OK today -- my operated knee gets better each day and my other knee behaved itself today although I didn't do much, just walking around the house.

I had a lovely long online chat to my son and his partner last night.  They are in Sydney and are so glad they didn't book a holiday as they are locked down there at the moment. He had some good news -- a movie project that he has been working on for a few years now has finally got the green light and will go ahead with the backing of a major film studio.  He will be the director and he has some great talent lined up.  He now just how to sort the legal details of the contract with a US lawyer and it will be all go!  

Merry Christmas to you all, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas day with loved ones.

~ Lynda

Our rather sad Christmas tree bought as a fundraiser for the local emergency helicopter.  Not the best tree we've had but it's fitting for 2020 :)

A better day today?

Yesterday was a real bummer for me.  Yeah, total pity party... woe is me etc.  I cried lots.  Stu has to go out every day at the moment and help his Dad pack and organise his stuff so I'm here alone which is usually fine because I can walk to the beach or ride my bike to the shops etc.  I simply can't do either at the moment and when I did try to ride my bike I realised that the gears were not working so tried to adjust them and then the chain fell off and I got covered in black grease and just sat and cried. When Stu got home he helped fix it but I was simply too scared to ride it for fear of falling off and hurting my knee so I cried some more.

Clearly all of this has left me a bit depressed and I tend to cry at the drop of a hat at the moment which is totally not like me at all.  I do remind myself that everyone is alive and well, I am well (other than my knees) and I have everything going for me.  I just think I have had enough and this inability to just walk where I want or do what I want has worn me down.

My 'good' knee started to fully go on me again the other night and I've basically been nursing it so that I can at least walk a little when I need to.  I'm so over it and also so bloody annoyed that I will probably have to go through this entire knee replacement thing sooner than I thought.  

I also felt sad because on Facebook -- yeah where you see others living their best life -- I see friends out every day and night at fun work parties or get togethers drinking champagne or at vineyards etc.  While I'm happy for them, it brings home to me that I'm sitting here alone all day.  Poor Stu has had to cope with my dreadful moods and outbursts of anger and tears.  I can't even have a glass of wine and believe me, at this time of year it's when I notice it the most.

Today I plan to have a much better day.  He has to go off again all day but is picking up a grocery order then will be home late afternoon.  We plan on having a meal out tonight at the local restaurant so that will cheer me up.  I'm making a birthday cake for my daughter today and then they all arrive tomorrow.  Having them all here will lift my spirits I'm sure :)

Sorry to grumble, to be honest I am often 'down' before Christmas, it really is not my favourite time of year for some reason.  I usually perk up afterwards when it is just holiday time. 

There will be happy holiday photos soon... 

~ Lynda

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

Yes, not long now!  Thankfully I don't need to go near a shop, all I need to do is relax and wait for the family to arrive on Christmas Eve.  The little local supermarket is well stocked so if I need anything, I know I can get it there.  A couple of years ago that wasn't the case and we'd have to travel over to Whitianga to get most groceries.

My operated knee is slowly getting better but does give me trouble in bed -- I find I have more pain trying to get comfortable but I'm sure that will improve with time.  My 'good' knee is still not right and I have to be so careful ALL OF THE TIME.  It is not as secure as it used to be and gives out on me every now and then.  I have to walk with it kind of straight all of the time so the result is I still can't walk normally!  Thankfully the pain has gone and the only time it is painful is when I go up or down steps.  I just hope it gets me through the summer!

The world seems to be in a lot of pain at the moment with the corona virus and I take no day for granted here.  If the new strain gets here from UK (the one that is more contagious) I'm sure we will end up in lock down again.  We have been so very lucky here to have our freedom but that could change at any time.

I am sick to death of those who say that it's just a 'cold'.  I sometimes read Chef Pete Evans' Facebook page and he has gone from being a chef who promotes healthy eating (I used to follow him) to a complete conspiracy theory QAnon person.  Nearly every post he writes now is pro-Trump or anti the virus/vaccination.  He calls it a simple cold and those who fear it are simply clowns.  I know we all have our opinions but seeing the dreadful deaths being suffered by so many overseas I wonder about his complete lack of empathy.

It's a gorgeous day here and I am going to try to walk to the beach later.  I managed that yesterday but it really is hard work -- a simply stroll is now a major effort due to both knees not being 100%.  

If I don't come back before Christmas, I hope you all have a great day and a happy holiday break.

~ Lynda

My other knee and a little history

Firstly let me say, with much annoyance and tears, that my other 'good' knee has completely gone at this point.  As I said yesterday, it was pretty sore a couple of days ago and then seemed pretty good on the day of the Christmas party.  Yesterday, however, it 'snapped'.  I mean it literally just went and the pain was like a knife being stabbed into my knee.  I couldn't walk or stand at all.  I rested it all evening and poor Stu had to wait on me.  Luckily I made it to the toilet later and bed.  

This morning it is very, very tender and I know if I put any weight on it the pain will return.  Other than medication and anti-inflammatories there is zero I can do about it and can only hope that it will become 'walkable' for the summer break.  I have a specialist appointment in January so will ask to get this knee X-rayed as well as the other one. It sure looks like another knee replacement will be sooner rather than later.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Vickie asked lots of questions so I thought I'd answer here :) The party we went to is a day time/evening one that has happened every year for many, many years.  I've only been attending for around 18 years.  It is for family and also 'adopted' family ie, people who Stu's father and stepmother met years ago and consider to be like family.  It is a given that everyone goes so there was no risk of anyone not attending (ie, missing out on the surprise wedding).  Stu's dad did insist that everyone be there by 4.15pm this year and did ask for people to confirm so now we know why!  

Stu's sister always makes any gathering a boozy affair as she is a big drinker and for years Stu matched her beer for beer until I simply refused to put up with it.  He does not get drunk now (well hardly ever) and I am very grateful for that. His habits have changed and I am very happy with that.

Some of the younger cousins and nephews are the ones who my daughter meets with and it's instant drinking time.  She does not drink often but is more of a big drinker when she does (pretty sure it's the same with her husband, they love a big blow out).  I hate it.  Even when I drank wine, which looking back now was too often, I never got drunk.  I loved a small glass or two or three and then I'd stop.  I always knew to stop whereas some people don't have that in them at all, especially when their piers are in party mode too.

Clearly now though I don't drink at all.  I think I'm happy about that :)

Another question: There is never drinking and driving.  Everyone these days gets an Uber or taxi.  That is one really positive thing that has changed in our society especially with the younger generation.  I don't know of anyone who doesn't make an alternate plan when drinking.  Some stay where they are but most either have a sober driver or Uber. 

A little history.  My father was an alcoholic but I never knew growing up because when I was little he stopped completely - my mother gave him an ultimatum from what I gather.  He was a drunk, the kind who rolled in from the pub in a dreadful state and I can't imagine how it must have been for my mother for years.  After she died in 1978 he resumed drinking and would go to the local RSA club and get drunk.  He only stopped when he moved with my brother to a place where he couldn't drink! 

My grandmother was an alcoholic. After her husband died in the 60s she turned to whiskey and when we went to her home (she lived in the South Island) to 'rescue' her (she went to a mental institution to dry out, she went completely mental with the booze) we found literally hundreds of little white horses in jars.  Each one had come on a whiskey bottle and she'd saved them.  Apparently the local hotel was delivering her whisky for a long time - sad.

My daughter was not brought up to see lots of drinking, I was never a party animal!  Her drinking started when she went flatting and I know it got quite bad and I feel that's when her anxiety and depression surfaced. There has never been a time when I've been able to control that.  

So that's a little history on my dislike/hate of drunkenness.  My mother never drank.  My sisters don't drink and in fact the only 'drinker' out of my entire family of 8 siblings is my oldest brother (and me of course when I drank).

So that's the story - I can only hope that my daughter changes her 'party' ways at some point but there is not much I can do except chat to her when she is in a receptive mood. It's a very difficult conversation to have with someone but I think I'm ready to talk to her about it again soon.  How to do it without being seen as judgemental though??

Hopefully my knee will get better so I can enjoy the summer. My operated on knee is getting better all the time.

~ Lynda

Vast improvement!

Over the last few days my knee as improved a lot.  I can now walk up and down stairs the 'normal' way but still keep a good grip on the bannister.  Previously I was walking down one step at a time slowly, now I can go left, right, left, right etc.  Yesterday was Stu's family Christmas -- the last one held at the house on the beach -- and I did a massive amount of walking and walked up and down the stairs there many times!  Yes, I could have rested up but I wanted to help as there is always so much to do.

An added surprise was a wedding!  While giving his traditional speech, Stu's Dad also said that there would be something handed out to everyone... it was a wedding invitation for his granddaughter wedding (Stu's deceased sister's daughter).  Here is the invitation with faces blurred (best to do without asking permission).

After that the room was cleared and the wedding set up and before we knew it the bride and groom were getting married!  It was lovely, especially when she walked out and her cousin who gave her away was holding a photo of her Mum who would have been the one to give her away had she lived. The groom's parents and brother were there but we hadn't clicked that it was for a wedding, just for the Christmas party!

After that it was a lovely night but oh so tiring!  The boys had their lolly scramble (sugar overload), dinner was wonderful and there were presents for all the kids and then $10 presents for all the adults.  I was so sore and tired by the time we got home and my leg ached all night -- I did overdo it.

On a downside to the night my daughter got into her party mode/alter ego, 'Patricia'.  I don't particularly like 'Patricia'.  When my daughter meets up with certain others too much drinking occurs.  I'm helpless to intervene, they are adults and that's their way of having fun but I was so bloody angry last night.  She got 'drunk' way too early... she started on the wine around 3pm and was well on her way by the time the wedding started.  By kids' present time she was boozed.  By food time she couldn't even put food on her plate without it slipping off and her husband was not much better.  

I have no problem with people enjoying a drink but I hate drunkenness.   I especially hate it when some people are sober and helping and being responsible adults and looking after kids or cooking and clearing up and others are out on the lawn totally pissed.  You get the idea.  Then to add insult to injury some of the 'others' who were also drunk asked if we (Stu and me) would take the boys home and could my daughter and her husband stay the night.  Yep, total blow out.  You might be able to sense my disappointment at my daughter?  Not surprising though as it's a regular thing when she gets together with this lot.

They all will go home today (from the beach house) and we'll stay on for another night.  There's loads of stuff to put away, sort and clean up here but once they've all gone it won't be so hard.

Oh, and my other knee is playing up so it's definitely looking like I'll need to go through this whole knee replacement thing again... oh the joy.  I had a little cry about that but that's life.

~ Lynda

UPDATE:  Daughter came home and I didn't mention a thing.  Not worth falling out over.  It's just the way it is and I don't want to stir up bad feeling.  I think she knows how she acted without me telling her.

Present time for the kids - what a frenzy it was!!

The lollie scramble - the boys were so excited :). There were more kids than this but that's Charlie in the light blue shirt and Cole in the black T shirt.

Slowly, slowly...

I really do feel that I'm not doing much better but I suppose I am but it's slow.  I am pulling back on the pain relief now and while there is pain, it's not severe.  I can walk pretty well but it is uncomfortable and I can't wait for the day I can walk pain free!

My daughter popped around this morning for a lovely long chat - they are going to buy a site on a camp ground up north which includes an a large onsite caravan with an awning.  They are so excited because it will include a boat park which is something they don't have at their house so they'll now also be able to buy a boat.  The downside is that if we continue to go over to the Coromandel for our breaks and they go up north we will hardly see them!  We really are left wondering what to do.  So many decisions to make but no hurry.

We'd love to live up north... sell here and buy a home an hour or two north of Auckland but that leaves us with the dilemma of Stu's ageing father being about 4 to 5 hours drive away and that really won't suit us right now.  Who knows what we'll do?  

I've finished three photo albums, one for each of the boys and have had them printed out.  I got three copies of Fletcher's one - one for him, one for his father and the other for his grandparents.  I'm not working on one for the other grandparents.  It's such a big job but I'm getting there.

Other than that life is good.  I had a clear mammogram this week so I'm very pleased with that - adding breast cancer to my not so healthy year would not have been ideal!  I think I've ticked all the health boxes now so fingers crossed I'll be good for awhile.  

~ Lynda

Here's me and my leg since the dressing has been off.  Also a close up of the same photo.  It's looking way better than I thought it would.

How cute are these two little boys?  Stu took this photo the other day while they were playing in the back of his car.

That's Stu's father in the back of that car as Santa.  He does this every year for the local Whitianga Christmas parade.  He loves it!

 

Opps... it's been over a week!

I'm doing well.  I've reduced my pain medication to only one slow release pill in the morning, still taking the paracetamol and having one anti inflammatory pill at night.  I can walk pretty well now without any aid and so far, on just two days this week, I clocked up over eight kilometres!  That was just shopping. On Wednesday my daughter and I hit the mall and took care of most of the presents plus spent absolutely ages walking around looking at all the new shops and restaurants in the new section of Sylvia Park Mall.

It was really lovely to spend the time with her while she was in a really happy mood and I really pushed myself to the limit with all the walking and standing I did!  I figure it's great therapy though and I know that with my 'old' knee I would have been hobbling around in pain way more than now.  I then went to the local shops on my own (first time driving and out on my own) and walked around a bit there.

Yesterday Stu's father came over and we all went to a furniture store where he knew one of the sales team and he/we picked out all the brand new furniture he wanted for his new home which he moves into in January.  It kept it simple to only look at one store so we didn't get confused with too much choice.  He chose three new beds, a lounge suite, dining table and chairs, coffee table, bedside cabinets, TV and a very special lounge chair specifically for him.  It's electric and so easy for him to get up from - he has rheumatoid arthritis and can't stand up by himself from an ordinary lounge chair.  This new (expensive!!) chair has an electric control that tilts the chair forward and up to make it easy to get up plus it has an electric foot rest and tilt back function.   I jokingly said he won't need his new bed because he'll fall asleep in the chair :) 

I think he was very grateful for our help and advice in picking out everything because it was pretty overwhelming.  Thankfully he has great taste and everything he loved was fresh and modern.  He's 84 years old and said 'Oh, I don't want all that old fashioned stuff'... how gorgeous. 

We have the two youngest boys coming to stay tonight as the mother has a mammogram late afternoon.  We both had one scheduled for earlier this week but the equipment needed urgent repair so both of our appointments were changed.  Mine is now tomorrow morning - always good to get that out of the way for another year.

Did I mention that my daughter is an amazing mother even though she constantly doubts it?  She reads them an entire chapter of a book every night.  I mean, who does that?  They have been through most of the Enid Blyton famous five stories and now they are on to the Harry Potter books.  Of course, it has made them Harry Potter crazy which I think is gorgeous.  I'll leave you with a photo of them yesterday after Mum bought them some accessories.  They were very happy indeed!

~ Lynda

 

Good days and bad days

So there I was feeling like a million dollars... pain under control and doing so well!  We came over to the beach house on Tuesday and had our neighbour over for drinks.  He was amazed at my mobility and wellness, as was I.  That was then.

Yesterday I woke up feeling like shit but took my pills that the doctor prescribed.  He told me to cut one in half to start reducing the dose which I did... except that it made me so ill that I couldn't function AT ALL.  I spent the day feeling nauseous (didn't bring my pills for that over as I thought I was over that) and really unwell.  I stayed in bed all day.  I then looked at the pills again and under the stuck on label (with my name on etc) was the warning 'do not cut, take pill only whole'.  Yep, I'm sure that's why I was so sick but am pretty annoyed that he told me to cut it!

I'm hoping for a much better day today for sure.  I just want this to be over and get on with being well.  Luckily the weather yesterday was rubbish so I couldn't have gone anywhere anyway.  I won't try to walk to the beach but we can go in the car and then I will walk a bit.  

I'm busy making up the photo albums but couldn't even focus or keep my eyes open to do much yesterday.

My daughter had an appointment at Starship children's hospital the other day for Cole.  He has dreadful trouble writing and had lots of other issues and was referred on to them.  She got this miserable doctor who was very rude - the same doctor she had seen when Charlie got his diagnosis for autism.  She was basically told that there is nothing they can do and was dismissed which left my daughter feeling absolutely rock bottom.  They are going to test Cole for Celiac disease though as he as all the symptoms.  That will involve feeding him gluten for about 8 weeks first but at least we will know one way or the other.  As for his inability to write, there is nothing that can be done that will be free.  She will have to pay hundreds of dollars now for him to get some sort of private help.  This astounds me, you'd think there would be some decent help to these kids who have dysgraphia and dyslexia.   

I'll leave you with a couple of photos of Charlie and Cole doing their school end of year concert.  It had an Aladdin  theme and they both did dances which they totally rocked!!  I was so proud of them.

~ Lynda

All good !!

I had my follow up appointment with the specialist today and it went really well.  He was extremely pleased with my progress and said I've got an excellent amount of bend in my knee -- he said he would hope for that amount at around 3 months and some people never get so much bend.  He said my recovery is in the top 95th percentile. Go me :). It's all looking good and clean and he took the staples out (ouch).  We talked about medication going forward so I'm completely sorted now until my next appointment in 7 weeks.  

I still have good days and not so good days but today I feel really good.  I can walk pretty well with no crutch but will still use it for longer walks.  I try really hard to walk normally ie, straight leg out and no limp.  

Tomorrow we are off to the beach house for about a week and I can't wait!!  I'm busy making the albums for the boys for Christmas (online then get them printed out).  I've nearly finished Cole's one but then there is Charlie's, Fletcher's, the family one and some for the grandparents.  Phew... Oh well, it keeps me busy.

I'll leave you with photos we took today of my leg showing the knee replacement.  We got to see the bits he put in and wow they are heavy!  I'm so glad it's all over and just now have to hope I don't need the other one done.

~ Lynda

No wonder it bloody hurt!! That pin bit goes into my leg bone.  

I'm well :)

It's been a long two weeks let me tell you... a rough ride.  Thank you all for your comments, help and advice -- it's really appreciated.  I think if I ever have to get my other knee replaced (highly likely) then I will be much better placed to know what to do, medications to take and what to expect.  I really did go into this blind because reading too much about it all scared me too much.

Since I changed to the slow release medication the pain has certainly been better managed.  All I am now taking are two slow release codene type tablets and my four x 2 a day paracetamols. That seems to be controlling everything right now so the next stage will be to cut the codene tablets but I'm off to see the surgeon on Monday for my follow up so I'll discuss all of that with him then.

I can bend my leg back quite a lot now and can also straighten it completely so I think I'm doing OK.  I bike in ten minute blocks when I'm up to it and am gradually making my knee bend further by lowering the seat (part of the requested rehab). It's all coming together thank goodness.  

To keep busy I have been watching the news out of USA, my goodness so much going on there with politics.  I also read world news, especially regarding Covid with has become so bad everywhere it seems. We really are living a great life here in New Zealand, it's like living in a parallel universe.  The only restriction on us here is mask wearing on public transport.  I know it will all be over soon but sadly, so many deaths worldwide.

I watched Rachel Maddow the other night (I love Rachel and have watched her show for a long time).  She was alone at home, self isolating, after her partner was diagnosed with Covid.  It was heart wrenching to see her talk of her love for her partner and how she nearly lost her.  If anyone is interested, here is a link to that.  She really made this whole thing so real.

I am about to make a start on the boy's annual photo albums that I make for them every Christmas.  It's such a long job and I just can't get my head around it yet.  My brain is still a bit scrambled from the last two weeks!  My eyesight has still not returned to normal either, I even wonder if it will?  I don't want to spend money on new lenses if it's only a temporary thing... more to ask the doctor on Monday.

~ Lynda

Better today for sure!

Yesterday was a dreadful day.  I literally couldn't keep my eyes open so had to stay in bed most of the day.  I dozed on and off and the rest of the time was spent feeling sick.  Today I took less pain medication, just my slow release pill in the morning, my paracetamol, nausea pills and one quick acting pill overnight (middle of the night my leg seems to get really sore).  I wasn't nauseous at all and not nearly as tired as yesterday so thank goodness I seem to be able to get by on less pain meds.  

I did ten minutes on my bike today and was going to do more but tomorrow's another day.  I do lots of stretching and trying to bend my leg in more and seem to be doing OK with all of that. 

Things are looking up but I still can't imagine actually being able to walk normally with this knee!

We have been doing click and collect grocery orders as it's easy for Stu to just pop to the supermarket and get them.  Also that way I don't have him buying all the wrong stuff or paying way too much for something I know can be cheaper.  He has no concept of prices and picks up the first thing he sees regardless of cost.

Today my son-in-law participated in a fund raising event called "Throw your boss off the Sky Tower".  It involved bosses, nominated by their employees, jumping off the Sky Tower and my SIL was crapping himself with nerves.  He handled it by not thinking about it until the last minute but you could tell he was pretty relieved when he landed.  He hates heights so this was a massive challenge for him!

I'm so glad things are looking up for me, it's been a difficult time for sure.

~ Lynda

Jumping off the tower...

The boys went in to watch their Dad jump, I bet they were excited!

Much improved but...

Yes, there is a but.  The new drugs I got are better for pain but I'm now having difficulty keeping my eyes open.  I was also sick yesterday and have felt sick for hours today.  I have taken the anti nausea medication but that didn't seem to work. Apparently this only lasts a few days but I think I'll reduce the amount of pain medication a bit.  I'm definitely not in as much pain as I was over the weekend which is great.

Another odd/interesting side effect I have had since the operation has been to my eyesight.  I usually wear glasses for TV and driving (distance) and have only needed reading glasses for sewing.  Now my distance vision is great and I need glasses for all close up work!  I put my glasses on when in the car the other day with Stu and they made my vision all blurry so I took them off and boom... it was like having them on before the operation.  I don't suspect this will last but if it does I need to get my eyes retested and all new glasses!

I'm not eating much at all -- yesterday's breakfast was brought up and dinner was the tiniest amount of food.  I did have some scrambled egg and toast for breakfast and so far I've kept it down but only just. 

I've hardly done any exercise but am managing stretching and flexing -- I seem to be doing OK.  I'll get fully into more when I feel up to it.

That's my lot, I feel sick again.

~ Lynda

More drugs

We went to the doctor first thing this morning (couldn't get in yesterday) and she has prescribed much stronger pain relief  - I think it's similar to what sparklingmerlot was taking (yesterday's comment).  I have a slow release oxycodone and an immediate release one as well.  I still need to take my anti nausea medication and paracetamol.  I feel like a druggy but seriously have no choice -- the pain has been so bad and I simply can't take it anymore.  It's not just knee pain but a dragging, gnawing pain right down my leg.  

Hopefully now I can get some exercises done and relax a little without pain.  I'm pretty annoyed that I wasn't given good pain relief earlier but I suppose everyone is different.  I don't usually have a low pain threshold (had two babies naturally) but this is so different.  It just wears me down completely.

Stu has made up a chart to record what I take and when and he's being a really good nurse :) Last night I was so upset he gave me a foot massage (not something he'd usually do) and we put on 'spa' music.  It was nice.

I'm hoping my eyesight returns to normal after all of this!  I now need reading glasses and my long distance glasses make my vision worse.  Luckily I'm not driving anywhere (can't anyway on this medication).

Hopefully this will all help me.  

~ Lynda

Miserable

Sorry to be negative but I'm not feeling so good.  I don't have a great understanding of pain control.  Thankfully the Tramadol in combination with an anti nausea tablet seems to work and not make me sick or too dizzy.  I am so confused about it all especially as I'm meant to be doing exercises about 5 times a day and I find it hard to to anything at all.  We are going to phone the specialist on Monday to try to find out what I should be doing and what I should be expecting.  Last night was awful, so much pain but I now know to take more of the serious pain medication so hopefully that won't happen again.

Add to this constipation (which is expected after surgery) followed by an entire night of the opposite.  Let me tell you, getting up and having to go to the toilet every five or ten minutes was not pleasant.  

One thing that has happened since the operation is my eye sight has deteriorated -- blurry vision.  I mentioned that as the hospital but there seemed to be no concern.  I've read that the medications can do this so I will just have to wait and see if it comes right.  I need to concentrate of staying hydrated too. I'm seriously just so miserable and border line depressed about it all.  I can't see an end to it all at the moment. 

Stu is out cutting our massive hedge today and Fletcher is here to help clean up (usually my job). 

So that's me today, I truly hope I can post a more positive update soon.

~ Lynda

Damn, blast, bugger

First day home went well.  I was keeping myself iced, doing my physio and slept well.  So far so good until...

Yesterday.

I was doing so well but really needed tramadol for the pain and had been hoping to avoid that because it makes you a bit dizzy.  With Stu's help I got on the exercycle and did half rotations and finally managed full rotations with made me so elated I actually cried (yeah, it's all pretty emotional for me).

I had been super careful whenever I got up and used my crutches, clung on to everything secure around me and was doing so well then I fell.  FUCK.  Yep, the worst thing I could do.  Stu was in his office and heard the thud and there I was on the floor after ripping off my silver bracelet, putting a hole in the wall with the coffee table and ripping the dressing on my wound.  It took me awhile to get up and I just let it all out and cried and cried with both the total shock of what happened and the worry that I had damaged my knee.

We went straight to see my GP who said it all looked good but I had to get the wound dressed again.  I also had to file for ACC (accident compensation) in case it caused further problems.  My leg swelled up again and basically I was back to square one.  I can't even tell you how careful I am being but even with that I nearly lost my balance again this morning.  

I think it's OK and thankfully no damage was done other than to my wall.  Obviously if I have any issues I will call the surgeon but I'm due to see him in just over a week anyway.  I'm feeling really stressed about not doing my physio but at the moment I simply can't even think about that.  I do basic stuff that I can do while seated but just can't trust myself not to fall again.

I cry a lot. I hate asking Stu to do stuff but know I don't have any option.  I've never felt so helpless before and it all just sucks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On a happier note, yesterday was Fletcher's 15th birthday and they popped in on their way home from dinner out to have the birthday cake with us which was lovely.  He's such a lovely boy and we are so proud of the young man he is becoming.  

That's me for now, sorry about the negative post but I feel I need to record it to look back on when I'm feeling so much better.  Please let me feel better...

~ Lynda

Birthday cake... yum.  Clearly he takes fashion advice from his Mum, ripped jeans on them both :)

I'm home... thank goodness

I had the night from hell last night -- I was hot and sweaty all night and added to that I had urinary urgency.  So imagine pain when moving and having to get up about four times to the loo... I didn't sleep and by this morning I was a zombie.  I have no idea why I had that unless it's a hangover from the catheter I had in (which was taken out on day 2).  Urine doesn't show an infection.

Food has not been great, mainly because seeing the name of something on a menu and seeing it when it arrives is two different things.  I thought I'd change it up this morning and get breakfast sausage and sautéed potato.  It was awful so I was left only with a slice of toast.  Oh well, such is life.  Stu is making a Caesar salad for dinner so I'm looking forward to that.

I've got lots of pain medication to take and need to get on with my physio but it's pretty darn painful.  I think I'll take the more serious pain relief before the stretching exercises! 

I have a new dressing on my suture which looks way less scary so I won't be upsetting my boys so much now.  

Regarding the pain (for Isabel who is going to get this surgery), it's not so bad really.  I find it more of a dull ache through my leg which is pretty constant and that wears me down a bit.  I can move around pretty well and find just using one crutch works well around the house.  Once this is over and done with I won't be afraid of getting the other knee done if I need.  It was more the anaesthetic and morphine that messed with me.   

Hopefully I'm much better tomorrow after sleeping in my own bed!!!

~ Lynda

Home tomorrow

Well it's been up and down for me -- I've slept reasonably well which is good but I'm still lacking much energy.  I had quite a bit of pain in my lower leg today so had to have morphine again.  Hopefully that will not be needed from now on.  

I've been doing the physio exercises which are really difficult.  Getting the full use of my knee back will not be easy but I know it will happen.  I can walk around now on crutches and can also shower and toilet on my own which is great.  The surgeon put a new kind of plaster/cover thing on my wound and every nurse who comes in comments on it -- it looks like a pork roast with the string wrapped around.  I have a photo but it might gross you out if I post it.

Today the boys came for a visit as they had no school -- it's also Stu's birthday so they both made him a birthday card.  Poor Charlie didn't know what to do when he saw me, he his behind his Mum and nearly cried!  He came right of course and we ended up having lovely cuddles.  It was lovely having them all here xx

It's Fletcher's birthday on Wednesday and he'll be 15 years old!  No present from us on the day as he's already had an iPhone plus ear buds from us, I think that's enough!  He's coming to stay on Friday which will be nice.

I'm going to continue seeing a physiotherapist after I get out of hospital, I think my insurance pays for some of this at least.  I know it's very important to get full use of my knee early on.

Right, a few photos taken today.

~ Lynda

Charlie and Cole -- cuddles after being scared when they first saw me, they don't like to see Nana not well.

Poppa and Charlie

The 'getting better, no makeup' hospital photo

Not so good

So here I am at 3 am feeling miserable.  My leg hurts, I feel nauseous and everything is painful.  I'm on all kinds of painkillers but it turns out this is a pretty painful procedure (I knew it would be). I'm on anti nausea pills as well.  I can't just get up to go to the toilet because I'm strapped into this pump this on my feet to help prevent DVT.  I need the help of nurses to do anything.

I did manage to get some sleep and I'm so hoping today will be a better day than yesterday where I was so tired.  

I'm not really eating either.  I have to order what I want the day before and find that I'm leaving it all - I hate wasting food.  Today I've only ordered a little food.  So there you go, totally miserable and hoping to feel better really soon.  

~ Lynda

Edit:  Well it's now 12 hours later and I'm feeling a lot better. I had a real low this morning.  I ended up being sick and given two lots of intravenous medication for that which made me go completely foggy in the brain.  When the specialist came in to see my I couldn't even get any words out. I couldn't eat any breakfast but did manage some clear chicken soup and a bun for lunch along with some crackers and cheese.  I'm sure I'm on the mend now as they are stopping the medications that were causing the issues.  Hopefully I'll still get enough pain relief though!

I got up on crutches today for the first time and I'm sure I'll get the hang of that with practice.  The staff are all so patient and I just keep apologising for being so pathetic.  

Thanks for the comments, I won't reply to them all individually but I love hearing from you all. 

All done

I had my knee surgery yesterday and it went really well.  The doctor said it was quite bad so clearly I'm glad I didn't have to put up with it for much longer.  I didn't sleep at all last night due to having a blood pressure monitor go off every half an hour and also an alarm that says my oxygen was dropping.  Thank fully they upped the oxygen to stop that but it was a long night.  It will be easier tonight because I won't be attached to so many things.

The staff are lovely and my private room is wonderful.  I started on the physical therapy today and have already been up on a walker.  That's what I'll be using to get to the loo until I get more steady on my feet and master the crutches.

So onwards and upwards... I'm looking forward to being more mobile again in a few months.  

Thanks for your best wishes, it's much appreciated.

~ Lynda

One last look at my old knee.

Ready to go to surgery.

And not forgetting my wonderful surgical underwear :)

Damn and blast

 EDIT:  my covid test was negative (of course).

At the testing centre, waiting for my turn

Last week when we looked after the boys they were just getting over a cold.  My daughter had both of them tested for covid and they were negative.  As luck would have it I then got the cold.  We got back from the beach house yesterday and I phoned up about my surgery and was told that unless I have a negative covid test, I can't go for surgery (I knew that anyway).  

So off I went this morning to the pop-up testing centre at Western Springs and got my test done.  They said the result should be within 24 hours so I'm certainly hoping I know by Friday morning so that I can go for my surgery!  

I'm 100% sure it will be negative as we don't have community transmission at the moment in Auckland and I've not been anywhere to catch it.  

So I'll be watching the US elections and waiting for my result :)

~ Lynda

All good

I got my test results back and they were all good - no nasty bugs so my operation will go ahead.  I also got my colonoscopy done and another polyp removed.  I'd had a bit of diverticulitis the previous week so apparently during my colonoscopy they had to give me more medication because it was uncomfortable.  I wouldn't know because I was sedated the entire time!  The prep for this was dreadful -- usually I manage to drink the entire 3 litres of the stuff that makes you go but I vomited some up this time.  Yuk... three more years until I have to do that again.

We went to my sister's 75th birthday on Saturday and then came over to the beach house for a few days and home tomorrow.  Stu's Dad came for dinner tonight so that was lovely.  He has visibly aged this year which has not been helped with his wife dying and the stress of her will being challenged.  That has all been sorted now but he has certainly settled for less just to end it all.  At 84 he doesn't have years to spend arguing over a will and just wants to get on with life.  He's bought a lovely home in a retirement village and is very excited to move in after Christmas.

My sister seemed pretty surprised that I was at her party because I've not answered any of her phone calls.  You will recall she was spreading the story that my Stu 'came on' to her... untrue of course and even though I went to her party, I'm still angry at her lies.  You simply can't believe anything she says and I could tell she was telling lies even in the short time I was there.  It was lovely to catch up with other family though so worth putting up with her for a short time.

I've been for a few walks while here -- just short ones though due to my knee being sore.  It's not been so bad the last few days, of course it's not so bad when I'm due to get surgery!

OK that's my lot, home tomorrow then a haircut and colour on Wednesday then surgery on Friday -- yes, I'm scared!!

~ Lynda

Make up on ready for lunch out.

The boys and me at my sister's birthday lunch.

The beach - of course I have to put in beach photos!

Tests and medical stuff

Today I went to get my blood tests for next week's operation.  I also had to do three different swabs -- nose, groin and rectum.  Hopefully all will be well for the operation to go ahead.  

Today I am in full prep mode for tomorrow's colonoscopy so I'm now on a liquid only diet and then tonight I have to drink 3 litres of that awful stuff that cleans you out.  Yep, too much information and it really is bloody awful.  The colonoscopy is a breeze compared to the prep!  I've also booked my mammogram in for December and this time I'm doing a 3D one called Tomosynthesis.  Apparently it's more accurate and I do have to pay a part cost for this (my normal mammogram is covered by my insurance).  Just to clarify for NZers, I've never been part of the free mammogram scheme because I've always been covered under my private insurance.

Hopefully after all of this testing and my operation I can just be healthy and keep away from damn doctors! No more testing for ages.

I am so glad I'm getting my knee done though because I really can't walk much now.  Sure I hobble around the supermarket or to the letterbox but that's about my lot.  I've been getting on the exercycle everyday to strengthen my leg muscles and while I'm as nervous as hell about my operation, I know it has to be done.  I just hope my right knee will hold out for a long time.

My last post was about the building in our street... my goodness it's all go today!  There are THREE building sites literally at the front of our gate.  Trucks and diggers everywhere.  I also mentioned my neighbours and not doing their garden... they painted their fence at the weekend and are fully planning on gardening so that's great news.  Mind you, they had to ask if the garden on their property was their responsibility??  Um, yes. 

Anyway that's me for today

~ Lynda

Below: The white houses you can see are in the process of being finished, the groundwork is being done.  , The section to the right is where a house has just been pulled down and there is a digger on there too.

The house next door to us, two houses going up there.  It's all go in our street!

My Street

I live in Auckland which is the biggest city in New Zealand.  There is a shortage of housing so the Council has approved in-fill housing, multi story buildings in suburban areas and complete rebuilding of some areas.  

In my local area the Government housing area nearby has had many homes removed and masses of new homes are being built in their place which will house many more people than the original homes. Our street is part Government housing and part privately owned.  Next to where I live a house burned down a few years ago and there is finally building going on there - two houses in the place where there was one.  Across the road from us there are three houses on a section which used to hold one.

Then... while we were away on holiday last week ANOTHER house disappeared completely!  Before we went away there was zero indication that the house would go but just like that it's gone and already the diggers are on the site to put up God knows how many homes!  There is building all around us and the road is full of contractors' vehicles all day.  Just around the corner from us four homes have been built on impossibly tiny sections -- one literally on the side of a hill and another basically on a front lawn. 

Around the other corner a three story apartment block has been built and these seem to be popping up all over the place.

We have a water shortage due to the bad planning of the Council and even during winter (our rainy season usually) we have not been allowed to use an outside hose -- it goes without saying that the restriction will get even more strict as summer approaches.  The lawn and garden are already getting dry, we can't wash our car with a hose and we are unable to water blast our fence or anything else that involves water outside. 

I can't really explain how I feel about all of this except that I am ready to leave the city.  Yes, first world problems but it's all very unsettling and I'm over it.  Oh, and can I add... our new neighbours are definitely NOT gardeners and since moving in have not even swept up the bark that's all over their driveway.  I'm not expecting them to pull out the weeds any time soon.  I do hope they prove me wrong.

Tomorrow we are having the boys for a couple of days -- my daughter and her husband are going away and she failed to book us in to look after them!  We'd planned to go to the beach house this week and the boys said to me 'but how can you when we are coming to stay?'  My daughter was most apologetic that she had failed to finalise any plan with me (they had flights booked and are attending a celebration in Napier).  Oh well, I'll look forward to some lovely time with my boys :) Stu is over at the beach house today because our fibre internet connection was being installed and he had to be there.  He's a happy man though because he's got super fast 'gigantic' fibre both here and there now.

~ Lynda 

My new bicycle

Part of the pre and post operation work I need to do is build my muscles.  They recommend an exercycle  so we looked around at the options -- we didn't want to rent one because owning one will mean we can have an ongoing fitness option. Some of the bikes were really expensive and clearly better suited to those doing more advanced training or spin classes etc.  Stu googled it and up popped good old K Mart!! The reviews were almost 100% amazing so off we went last night to buy one.

It has a weight restriction of 100kg so we are both OK on it.  It's super simple to use which I really like -- I don't want or need crazy bells and whistles to complicate using it.  It has a computer that measures time, kilometres, kms per hour and calories burned.  I will mostly use the timer.  I just did 20 minutes (two lots of ten minutes) on a lower difficulty and upped the difficulty a few times.  It sure gets your heart rate up and will be fantastic for building up my quad muscles which is what is needed prior and after knee surgery.

The other fantastic feature of the bike... it is whisper quiet!  Seriously, no sound at all so you can watch TV or use it while someone else is watching TV and it won't bother them. Oh, one more thing?  It was really cheap, only $105... win/win.

We are off to the beach house tomorrow for Labour weekend.  We are getting fibre installed on Thursday so will have super fast internet there which will make it easier for Stu to work from there. 

I have a colonoscopy next Wednesday (so much excitement in my life, not) and will also get all my blood and other tests done next week ready for surgery.  I had x-rays done yesterday.

~ Lynda

Final days and home :)

We got back from our holiday on Sunday night after having an amazing time.  From beginning to the very end we loved it and will be doing another holiday down south in the future.

My knee has been very painful and most times I've walked I have limped and had to stop often.  I'm so glad I'm getting that operation soon -- this time away has really proved how bad it is.  Thankfully I managed to get around enough places and not miss too much but I really miss the long walks.

On Saturday we went to Riverstone Castle "Dot's Castle".  I'd booked a tour and wow, it was just wonderful.  Dot did the tour herself and she was just lovely.  The castle is her home and we had access to every single room and were free to wander around the entire place.  We were not allowed to photograph inside but it really was the most incredible place. Here is a link to an article about it with interior photos. After the tour we had a delicious lunch at the Riverstone Kitchen which is an award winning restaurant on the same property run by her son who is the chef.

This week I have to make appointments for x-rays and blood tests etc and I have been contacted by the doctor for even more tests because I have been in a hospital recently.  These tests are to see if I have caught any superbugs while there -- hopefully not!

Here are the last photos of our time away.

~ Lynda

The Glenavy Pub (Oamaru) where we had fish and chips on Friday night... nothing flash about this place but it was so friendly and welcoming.  A real 'local'.

The massive feed of fish and chips - I ate the coleslaw and fish but left a lot of the chips.  In the ten days away we only ate out once for dinner (this meal) and three times for lunch. Not bad for a holiday. We really enjoyed cooking and eating in the motorhome.

The walk home from the pub -- I had to say hello to the local hens.

The gift shops at Riverstone Castle full of all sorts of knick knacks.

The castle itself, a real monument to one woman's dream -- even the pond was put in especially for Dot.

The main entrance to the castle.

Lunch after the tour - mine was lamb and it was delicious.

Final day, Christchurch.  This is the Cathedral which suffered dreadful damage in the 2011 earthquake.  It is being restored which is a massive task and horrendously expensive.  

Regent Street in Christchurch -- this street dates back to the 1930s and is beautiful.  Of course I had to do another of my 'standing in the street' photos. Note the tram tracks... see my final photo below.

New Brighton beach pier -- we drove there after our time in the city and it was stunning, wow what a beautiful beach!

And finally I took the first photo while having lunch in Regent St and then the tram came by so close!